Monday, May 5, 2014

What would you do if a complete stranger invited you to their prom via the Internet? Even if you were flattered, wouldn't you also think it weirdly forward, possibly creepy? Of course, your reaction would depend upon various factors such as your life situation. If your time were worth hundreds or even thousands of dollars an hour, not only would it be creepy, but also unthinkably imposing.

Most ordinary people would turn down such an invitation without even considering it. Yet paradoxically, many people are enthralled by the same types of invitations directed at stars such as models and actors, whose time is far more valuable than that of an average person. Starstruck high school students throughout the country impose themselves upon celebrities by recording ludicrous videos and photos of themselves, posting them online, and rallying friends, acquaintances, and the press with the goal of garnering so much notoriety that their celebrity target can't easily ignore the "promposal".

They often succeed. Over the past couple of years, "celebrity promposals" have accrued so much attention that collectively, the phenomenon is difficult to ignore. A respected informational website even carries instructions on how to invite a celebrity to prom.

Some media outlets have called for dismissal of the trend; but there is no shortage of coverage of this year's batch of aspiring celebrity prom dates with their loony stunts and videos.

Superficially, celebrity promposals may seem funny and cute. However, their clownishness belies a slew of unhealthy attitudes such as egomania and selfishness, as well as delusional senses of entitlement. Professional fame doesn't entitle strangers to personal access. Publicizing unreasonable requests and portraying them as charming and innocent legitimizes audacity and glamorizes egoism.

As this article points out, publicity storms surrounding such proposals can generate a tremendous amount o f pressure for celebrities to respond, preferably positively. But what does the star gain from attending a high school prom? Practically nothing, but she has everything to lose. Pressuring a star to attend an obsessed fan's prom is asking her to put herself in a potentially risky situation in an uncontrolled environment. She would be a guest in an unfamiliar setting, accompanied by an obsessed fan and surrounded by strangers who could be jealous and resentful detractors. While most obsessed fans are harmless, abnormal passion and idolization can lead to violence, as in the case of Rebecca Schaeffer in the 1980s. Famous people are not superhuman; they are as vulnerable to malice as anyone else; and there is usually more of it directed at them.

Still, many celebrities reply to fans' promposals, and a few even accept the invitations. There is nothing inherently wrong with their acceptance; it is very kind of them. However, their generosity feeds the media frenzy surround ing these unreasonable requests, adding fuel to the fire of obsessed fans' hope that their fantasies may come true. An additional disturbing byproduct of a star's acceptance is that they are rewarding brazen behavior, thereby contributing to the common belief that persistence, no matter how inappropriate, pays off: it might be outrageously imposing, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

These attitudes are dangerous; and they should be censured rather than encouraged in a society that purports to condemn intimidation and harassment. Putting someone on the spot with a public proposal is likely to make the other person feel uncomfortable, whether or not he or she is a celebrity. Blatant exhibitionism towards any stranger shows a lack of consideration for their emotions; and if the person is of higher status, it shows contempt for their eminence. A sensational public request instead of a more personal private one indicates more interest in fame than in the person behind it. The star b ecomes totally objectified. As a celebrity, he or she is all-important, the subject of obsession; as a human, he or she is not important at all.

If a celebrity agrees to attend the prom, it is unlikely that the relationship will continue afterwards. Rather than inviting a schoolmate with whom he would have a better chance for a real relationship, the teenager invites a star hoping to share in her limelight and outshine his classmates.

The celebrity becomes the ultimate accessory, a status symbol. If she accepts, the high schooler will instantly be viewed as important because he convinced a celebrity to accompany him to prom. The public gaze is thus transmitted from celebrity to student. He is little more than a parasite, expropriating some of her fame for himself to become a star for the night, too. Even if his proposal is rejected, the attention generated by the ostentatious stunt is a consolation prize.

Paying attention to a teenager just because he asks a celebrity to prom in a video in which he boasts about himself, twerks, or poses nude with a strategically placed foam finger only grants his wish for publicity and condones his arrogant and puerile behavior. Someone in his 20s or older engaging in such behavior would probably be branded a pervert. It shouldn't be acceptable for high schoolers, either. Proms are supposed to be opportunities for high schoolers to act in a manner worthy of dignified adults.

Instead of showing off desperate attempts for attention, high school students should devote time to worthwhile pursuits. They should focus on building real relationships with peers rather than trying to arrange superficial public meetings with people far too important to bother with them for a bit of publicity.

Public interest in celebrity promposals is a symptom of society's megalomania. No star is likely to be impressed by a high schooler inviting them to prom. Why should anyone else? Teenage prom proposers are promoting themselves, but they have nothing substantial to promote except a willingness to showboat for the sake of farfetched fantasies. Likewise, expecting a star to respond to a presumptuous request for a personal favor undermines the star's professional accomplishments, which should be the basis for his or her fame. Fame thus becomes empty, insubstantial, an end in itself rather than a perquisite of ability and hard work. The celebrity's interaction with fans is viewed as more interesting than the real fruits of his or her labor. No wonder many celebrities are derided for perceived lack of talent and over-the-top behavior.

As members of the public and media, our attention would be better directed at matters more consequential than the overplayed whims and antics of fame-seeking teens. We should leave the glamour of proms to the students for whom they are intended, rather than elevating high school events to a grandiose status by urging celebrity participation.

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